The Nativity

Baby Jesus was born far away from home
In the stable of a stranger
He slept in the box that the animals ate from
A box that’s called a manger
We call that box a manger

An angel flew to some nearby shepherds
With a message he was sent
To announce the arrival of the son of the Lord
That what we call the Advent
His arrival’s called the Advent

The shepherds were happy as they could be
They were filled with elation
They went to the stable to praise the child
That’s called the adoration
It’s called the adoration

Christians believe that on that day
God’s word was made flesh
Some build models of that holy scene
That model’s called a crèche
A nativity or a crèche

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

Yiddish Words in English

Yiddish once was spoken by European Jews
Here are some Yiddish words that English speakers use

A waiter who spills soup on someone's lap is a schlemiel
A schlemazel is the guy who gets the worse end of that deal
With a lap full of hot soup it's no wonder that he squeals
Oy vey! I'm such an unlucky guy!

A fellow in a sauna most certainly is shvitzing
If he's chatting with somebody you can say they are kibitzing
Occasionally the rocks with water they are shpritzing
Otherwise the air would get too dry

A person who complains so much that it could make you retch
Is a kvetch!
A thing that isn't even worth as much as one flyspeck
Is drek!

These are Yiddish words that English speakers use

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

Pig Out

I’m gonna pig out!
I’m gonna pig out!
It’s Thanksgiving and I can’t wait to pig out!

On this food I’m going to glut
Soon I’ll have a bulging gut
I’ll open my belt to make more room
So more food I can consume
This cranberry sauce is not too sour
A large bowl I will devour

I’m gonna pig out!
I’m gonna pig out!
I’m gonna pig out!

Too much food I just did eat
Now my belly is replete
I have had more than enough
And my stomach’s overstuffed
I wish I had shown restraint
I’m afraid I’m going to faint

I wish I hadn’t pigged out!

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

The Utopian

He's dreaming of a better world

For a perfect society he is hopin'
His dreams are truly utopian
Some would say that he is idiotic
That his dreams are impossible
And he is quixotic

He'll concede that he is not realistic
That his dreams are perhaps idealistic
But even if they're unattainable in this place or era
That doesn't mean the dream he dreams
Is merely a chimera

He points out that your dream cannot come true
Unless you have a dream to pursue
And that the world might be a better place
If everyone else had his own dream too

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

Fancy Graves

The rich man built a big stone building
Where folks could come to see him
After he was dead and gone
It’s called a mausoleum

I started down a dark church stairway
And on one step I tripped
I landed in a place that was full of tombs
A room that’s called a crypt

In my hands are the ashes of a cremated king
Where do you think I should carry ‘em?
Let’s put those ashes in a fancy urn
And take ‘em to the columbarium

If all you leave behind is bones
That doesn’t have to be scary
You can put them in a hallowed place
That’s called an ossuary

If you want to spend eternity in a fancy grave
There’s no need to be a sulker
Just save your money your whole life through
And buy your own sepulcher

No, you don’t have to wind up in the cramped cold ground
When your time has drawn to a close
The world is full of fancy places
Where you can decompose

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

SUB Means Beneath or Below

Sub means beneath or below

Mare means the sea
That's what mare means
Ships that go beneath the water
Are called submarines

In the city of New York
All the night and all the day
Trains run beneath the ground
That's called the subway

A bully knocks you down
Man, that bully is rude
You lie still beneath his boot
You have been subdued

The water level rises
With the coming of high tide
After that it lowers
The water does subside

Just below the Arctic Circle
You'll find the subarctic region
If you go there, please dress warmly
Because it usually is freezing

Sub means beneath or below

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

I Want to Eat!!!

I want a meal and I want it fast
I'm looking for a quick repast
It doesn't have to be incredible
I'll eat anything that's edible
You can call them victuals or call them vittles
Just pile them on my plate, don't give me just a little
I want to eat!

If you want to make me say "Oh gosh!"
All you've got to do is give me a nosh
Give me something that's digestible
That's what I like to call comestibles
You know, I don't need any encouragement
To chow down a load of nourishment
I want to eat!
I want to eat!

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

My Many Moods

When I think about the past and get sad
I'm wistful
And when I'm glad, indescribably glad
I'm blissful

And when I'm liable to do anything
I'm capricious
When I feel the need to own lots of jewels and rings
I'm avaricious

These are my many moods

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

H O M Spells Man

The Spanish say hombre
The French say homme
H O M spells man
No matter where you're from
No matter where you're from

If you kill a man
In a courtroom you'll be tried
The crime you will be charged with
Is homicide

Chimps and gorillas
Have human-like features
We call them hominids
They're human-like creatures

A man who stays cheerful
In a lousy economy
Is a good-natured fellow
A model of bonhomie

Did I ever tell you
About my Uncle Gus?
He's only four foot six
He's a homunculus

The Spanish say hombre
The French say homme
H O M spells man
No matter where you're from
No matter where you're from

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

Animal Kingdom

If an animal gives milk
Like a cow or a camel
It's a mammal

All the worms in the Earth
And all of their kids
Are annelids

Creatures with external skeletons
And segmented bods
Are arthropods (like a crab or an insect)

Single-celled, microscopic
Creatures, you ought to know-a
Are protozoa (like amoebas and flagellates)

Mammals that live in the water
Needn't fear dehydration
They're cetaceans (like a whale or a dolphin)

They're all part of the animal kingdom

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

Bird Words

A man whose wife nags him all day is henpecked
A man with a burden he can't shake has an albatross around his neck
And I think you should know
A person who admits a big mistake has got to eat crow
These are bird words!

Somebody with a big advantage is sitting in the catbird seat
A person who tattles on his friends is a stool pigeon, that person's indiscreet
And if you are a sitting duck
You're a defenseless target, if you're attacked you are out of luck
These are bird words!

Bird Words!

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

Declaration of Independence

The Declaration of Independence says:

"We hold these truths to be self-evident"
That means they're clear for all to see
"that all men are created equal, endowed by their Creator"
That means God gave them that equality for free
"with certain unalienable rights"
Which means they can't be taken away
"among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness"
That's what the Declaration of Independence does say!

And that's not all it says. It continues

"To secure these rights, Governments are instituted"
A fancy way of saying that they are begun
"deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed"
Their power's based on the agreement of everyone
"And when they become destructive of these ends, "
When the government fails its citizens
"it is the Right of the People to alter or abolish it"
The people can just get together and demolish it

That's what the Declaration of Independence says!

Now think for a moment about what this means
It means you're not beholden to kings or queens
When it's time to choose a government, you get your say
Because the people have the power in the USA

Thanks to the Declaration of Independence!

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

Hemi, Semi, and Demi

Hemi, semi, and demi
Three prefixes that all mean "half"
Do we really need three? If you ask me
It's a halfway interesting mystery

A hemisphere is half a sphere
Think of half the globe
A semicircle is half a circle
Like the bottom half of your earlobe

Semiformal means "kind of formal"
You can dress to half the nines
A demigod is a lesser god
One parent is human and one divine

Semiannual means every six months
Six months is half a year
A demitasse is a half a cup
When you only need half as much liquid cheer

Hemi, semi, and demi
Three prefixes that all mean "half"
Do we really need three? Don't ask me!
All I'm going to do is shrug and laugh

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

You're So Immature

You're so immature
You're so silly and naive
Here are words that say how sure
I am that you're immature

Hallo!
You're callow
You're young and lack experience
Your smile
Is juvenile
You laugh at things that make no sense
(because you're such a baby)

I must croon
You're jejune
Like a little child you have no clue
I'm sure you'll
Be puerile
'Til long after this song is through

You're so immature
You're so silly and naive
I've sung some words that say how sure
I am that you're immature

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

P E D Spells Foot

Put your foot on the pedal and go
PED spells "foot" in Latin don't you know

An animal with four feet is a quadruped
That's four feet that can carry it up on ahead
A quadruped

Someone who takes a walk is a pedestrian
He uses his feet to move along the best he can
A pedestrian

Someone who can't move forward is impeded
Like a man whose feet are shackled, he's defeated
Impeded

A statue's feet stand firmly on a pedestal
That's the truth, I don't care if your friend said it's bull
A pedestal

Put your foot on the pedal and go
PED spells "foot" in Latin don't you know

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

It's Hot!

It's hot!
It's hot!

When the heat is excessive
It's oppressive

It's hot!

When it's so hot you feel horrid
It's torrid

It's hot!

When the heat could melt your ring
It's sweltering

It's hot!

When you wish you could just be disappearing
It's searing

It's hot!

When the heat's way more than trifling
It's stifling

It's hot!
It's hot!

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

Evil Everywhere

There is evil everywhere
There's no use to deny it
This song can't make it go away
But it can help you describe it

If you have no morals you are certainly depraved
You'd likely do most anything, your soul cannot be saved

Corrupt implies an evil you acquired from another
As in "He was a nice boy 'til he was corrupted by his brother!"

If your actions are so wicked that they pain us
The things you do can surely be described as heinous

I know this fellow who is strange, with a sheep he flirted
There's no doubt about it, that fellow is perverted

If you're like a devil, if some day in Hell you'll frolic
People might say accurately you're diabolic

There is evil everywhere
There's no use to deny it
This song can't make it go away
But it can help you describe it

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

Lots of Laughs

There are many different types of laughter
If I sing them to you now you might remember them after

You bite into some food that is really bitter
Your friend sees your face and he starts to titter

You notice that your teacher is a big nose picker
You know you shouldn't laugh but you start to snicker

A laugh that sounds like a bird is called a cackle
If it's loud enough, it will raise your hackles

The funniest thing that you ever saw
Is likely to cause you to guffaw

When you laugh real loud, that's called a chortle
We need to learn to laugh because we're mortal

There are many different types of laughter
If I sing them to you now you might remember them after

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

War and Peace

P A C and B E L
Are the Latin roots for peace and war
You can have one but you can't have both
Because when it comes to peace and war
It's a case of either/or

(We want P A C--PEACE)

Magellan sailed across an ocean
That was so peaceful he thought it was terrific
The ocean didn't have a name
So he called it the Pacific

I have a friend who will not fight
Fighting is a thing he does resist
He believes peace is the answer
He is called a pacifist

If you've got a shrieking baby
If that baby is a crier
You can calm him down and get some peace
By giving him a pacifier

(Give us B E L--WAR!)

I know something 'bout the Civil War
Do you think that I should tell 'em? [YEAH!]
The years before the Civil War
Are sometimes called the antebellum

A war against the government
Usually does not go well
Those who fight the government
Are called rebels, they rebel

Nations that fight one another
Can be called belligerents
They fight for peace but wind up dead
Or injured as a consequence
In this way, war does not make sense

P A C and B E L
Are the Latin roots for peace and war
You can have one but you can't have both
Because when it comes to peace and war
It's a case of either/or

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

In Other Words

My best friend is throwing a party
I can hardly wait for it to commence
I'm anticipating all the fun well have
Im thinking it will be immense

In other words it'll be great fun
I want the party to start and the waiting to be done

There's going to be some entertainment
Yeah, there's going to be refreshments there
We might get a little unruly
When the stereo starts to blare

In other words, well play our music loud
Well eat and drink and play games and be a wild crowd

Were going to have a party! Were going to have a party!

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

Disconsolate

I am disconsolate
I cannot be consoled
I have a sadness
That cannot be controlled

I am demoralized
My confidence is shaken
I could not be lonelier
I feel so forsaken

And I appreciate your trying to enliven me
But I dont want to be cheered up, cant you see

That I'm disconsolate
I can't be consoled
I have a sadness
That cannot be controlled

I am demoralized
My confidence is shaken
I could not be lonelier
I feel so forsaken

So leave me alone!

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

Theatre

We're going to the theatre
To the theatre we will go
Here are some words that you can use
To describe the show

If it's early in the afternoon
When you see a play
The show that you are seeing
Is called a matinee

When the play begins
The actors go to their positions
You learn the characters' backgrounds
That's called the exposition

The leading actor in the play
You simply can't resist
He is the hero of the play
He's the protagonist

The characters in the play
They talk to one another
This part is called the dialogue
It helps move the plot futher

You get to find out if the play
Ends the way you want
When do you get to find that out?
During the dénouement

We're going to the theatre
To the theatre we will go
And now you have some words to use
To describe the show

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

We've Got Hope

We've got hope, we've got hope, we've got hope

On a brighter future we're bankin'
You can call us sanguine
We can't be sure 'cause we're not clairvoyant
But about the future we're buoyant

We've got hope, we've got hope, we've got hope

Do you think we're going bananas?
Then call us Pollyannas
Do we lack the proper caution?
You can call us all Panglossian
But we don't think our hope is excessive
Because the future looks so impressive

We've got hope, we've got hope, we've got hope
We've got hope, we've got hope, we've got hope

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review

Bible Words

Well, the Bible is a great book but it uses some words
That in normal conversation aren't very often heard
Like cubit, rend, and harlot
Beget, beseech and smite
If you don't know what these words mean
Let me set you right

A cubit is the distance from your elbow to your fingertip
When you rend your clothing, you just grab it and rip

A harlot is a women who's romantically wild
Beget is just a fancy way to say "to have a child"

To beseech means to plead with somebody to do what is right
To smite means to hit somebody with all of your might

The Bible is a great book but it uses some words
That in normal conversation aren't very often heard
That's why we call them Bible words

by Tom Meltzer ©The Princeton Review